The following is known as political satire...
And if you’ve read my book “Stuck In An Elevator" and know that it only took me 90 minutes to create the initial draft, you’ll understand how quickly I imagine and write dialogue based on a photograph, scene or short snippet of conversation.
Again, this is political satire based on widespread reaction to a recent faux pas by 2020 Democratic Presidential Candidate, Joe Biden. Please keep that in mind as you read.
Enjoy...
“Girl whatchu MEAN you ain’t voting for Joe ‘cause he done went on the Breakfast Club and said to Brother Charlamagne if we can’t figure out whether we voting for him or Trump then we ain’t Black?!?! Aww girl he ain’t meant nuthin by it! Now you gon hafta learn that folk’ll say anything to get chu to vote for ‘em every four years. Old Mister Joe ain’t meant no harm by what he said...
Now gōn sit down and have you one of these here spirits and rest your nerves..."
"Taste good don't it? Every now and then Ole Mister Joe pour me a little bit of his good liquor in my ownnnn little bottle just for me. Say he can count on me, and having a little bit of his good liquor his way of letting me know, that he know, that he can count on me when push come to shove. Gōn gitchu one more sip and listen up...
Now what chu gōn do, is you gōn forget about what he said the other night on account of him just trying to get your vote. Then you gōn go down to that polling station come November, and you gōn give them good, "blue-tie-wearing" folk your vote, just like you and me always done. Trust me you gōn be all the better for it. Now you & me both listen to all of em when they was talking and debating and carrying on...
...And I know just as well as you do, that Ole Mister Joe there might not be the best candidate there is... but he surely all we got! Now I know there's time when he might not really like us all that much; but at least he smile at us when he talk to us... and that’s a WHOLE LOT more than I can say for ole slick-talking Mr. Donald... always talking down to folk he don't like.
Now come November, you just walk yo pretty lil self on down to that there polling station, <stops to take one more sip>... and keep repeating to yourself... "Anybody but Trump. Anybody but Trump.” I deCLARE it gōn make you feel better 'bout choosing Ole Mister Joe. Once we get Ole Mister Donald outta there, we just gon hafta hope and pray Old Joe THE ONE... who gōn finally sit down wit us, and listen to our concerns, and finally do something 'bout em!”
***
Now, to be honest, after seeing that #TheBreakfastClub interview with Charlemagne Tha God and looking at the statistic that shows the overwhelming percentage numbers of Afro-Americans that vote Democrat in every election, I began taking a long hard look at why I have voted the way I have voted for so long (as I'm sure did others). Did Joe mess up? According to him, he did; but I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. Maybe this was the cold wet washcloth slap we all needed to wake up and finally realize how this game called politics is played.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the satire. Got questions? I'd love to answer them for you in the comments below. In the meantime, have a great week!
All the Best!
—MT
Matt D. Talford is a writer, narrator, and author of three books: “Stuck In An Elevator” – a fictitious tale of passion and self-discovery; “Captain’s Mate: A Practical Guide for Tennis Captains, League Players and High School Coaches”; and his award-winning debut title: ”From Fear to Faith: A Survivor's Story" – a memoir about overcoming a rare form of what he calls "the C-word." All three books are currently available in paperback at www.talfordarts.com or at Amazon.com; and in eBook format on Amazon Kindle and Apple iBooks. “From Fear to Faith: A Survivor’s Story” is also available in audiobook (narrated by Talford himself) at iTunes, audible.com, and at many other sites where audiobooks are sold. For information on these and other products, click the “shop” link in the menu.
